Trans* Day of Remembrance 2014


 It is time once again to stand in solidarity with our LGBTQAI brethren on Trans Day of Remembrance to   honor the fallen.

The Transgender Day of Remembrance (TDoR) is reported to have been created in 1998 by Gwendolyn Ann Smith to memorialize the murder of Rita Hester in Allston, Massachusetts.  Since the 1999 vigil held, it has continued on every Nov 20th to remember not only those who self-identify as transgender but also those who were transsexual, crossdressers, or otherwise gender-variant victims of violence due to their perpetrator’s phobia and/or hate against transgender people.

Communities hold Transgender Day of Remembrance events for many reasons:

#1. It helps raise public awareness about the issue. Hate crimes against the gender-variant are glossed over or ignored entirely by most communities, with the victims of the crimes often misnamed (birth name rather than legally changed name or AKA) or improperly gendered (birth gender rather than lived gender). That is IF there is any media coverage at all.

#2. It allows the LGBTQAI and Allies a way to stand united to mourn for friends/family they have lost, those who were killed for being “like them”, and those who may have no one else mourn for them, since so many LGBTQ are STILL cast away from blood family & friends due to our society’s puritanical ideologies.

#3. It reminds non-gender variant people that we of the LGBTQAI community are SOMEONE’S child, mother, father, sister, brother, best friend, partner, co-worker, fellow parishioner, etc and as HUMANS are worthy of the same rights to safety, and freedom from persecution as every other human.

So before I list this year’s names for remembrance let me give you the writings of Rev. Paul Langston-Daley

As November 20th approaches, I will hold in my heart all of the transgender individuals who have made the brave move to be seen for who they truly are, as well as those who are still too afraid to be their authentic selves. I will hold in my heart the families and loved ones of those individuals whose bravery was met with misunderstanding, ignorance, fear and anger. I will even hold in my heart those who are unaware, ignorant and afraid, in the hope that they will understand and find compassion and love.”



Betty Skinner (52 yrs old)  Died 12/3/13
Blunt force trauma to the head.  Cleveland, Ohio


Brittany Nicole Kidd- Stergis (22 yrs old)  Died 12/4/13
Gunshot wound to the head.  Cleveland, Ohio


Kandy Hall (40 yrs old) Died 6/3/14
Massive trauma, body left in a field. Montebello, Maryland


Trans* Activist  Zoraida Reyes (28 yrs)   Died around 6/12/14
Strangled and left by a dumpster.  Anaheim, California


Mia Henderson (26 yrs old)   Died 6/16/14
Massive trauma, found dead in alley.  Baltimore, Maryland


Yaz’min Shancez (31 yrs old)   Died 6/18/14
Shot then burned behind a dumpster.  Fort Myers, Florida


Tiffany Edwards (28 yrs old)   Died 6/26/14
Shot to death in the middle of the road.  Walnut Hills, Ohio


Alejandra Leos (41yrs old)   Died 9/5/14
Gunshot to the back. Memphis, Tennessee
Funeral Fund: #RememberAlejandra. 


Aniya Parker (47 yrs old)   Died 10/3/14
Punched and then shot in the head.  East Hollywood, LA, California


Ashley Sherman (25yrs old)   Died 10/27/14
Shot in the head.  Indianapolis, Indiana


Gizzy Fowler (24yrs old)  Died 11/10/14
Gunshot. Nashville, Tennessee


Asheville, North Carolina
Transgender Day of Remembrance Thursday, November 20th, 2014 7:00PM
87 Haywood Street, Asheville, NC, 28801

Boone, North Carolina Transgender Day of Remembrance Vigil Thursday, November 20th, 2014 6:00 PM-7:30 PM
Appalachian State University Whitewater Room, Plemmons Student Union, 263 Locust St, Boone, NC 28608

Durham, North Carolina Transgender Day of Remembrance Candlelight Vigil Thursday, November 20th, 2014 6:00PM
115 Market St, Durham, NC 27701

Durham, North Carolina Transgender Day of Remembrance Community Memorial Altar Thursday, November 20th 2014
Intersection of Trinity & Washington

Greensboro, North Carolina, United States Transgender Day of Remembrance Thursday, November 20th, 2014 7:00PM-8:00PM
Tree of Life Counseling, 1821 Lendew Street, Greensboro, NC 27408

Greenville, North Carolina
Transgender Day of Remembrance Thursday, November 20th, 2014 6:00PM
East Carolina University (Green Room at Croatan) 100 Dixon Street, Greenville, NC, 27858

Hickory, North Carolina Transgender Day of Remembrance Thursday, November 20th, 2014 6:30PM-8:00PM
Lenoir Rhyne University, Belk Centrum Theater, Hickory, NC, USA

For more information on events in your area see

©RavenHarte 11/19/14


The Conscious Consumer

179e18f060734f09713c590d2c709638A friend sent me a link today to the org that used to be Miss Representation, which created an awesome movie about the exploitation of women in the media, body image issues we are passing to our girls etc. The link is to an app to help you identify which companies/products misrepresent women  or you can search for #notbuyingit on Twitter.

However I think everyone could be a little more consumer conscious, and not just about the issue of sexism, exploitation, and gender stereotyping in advertising, but about all the behind the scenes issues we wouldn’t be thrilled to know we were putting money towards, and this email came right after I just finished listening to Dan Savage’s newest book “American Savage” (on Audible, and Dan narrates HIMSELF) which just nailed the point home in my head. I dont just recommend this book, I think it is a MUST READ to get some serious plain language, even if with a liberal slant, on marriage equality, gun control, healthcare, and a host of other current topics, including what’s got me going on conscious consumerism.

In his book, he explains in pretty clear details exactly how the owners of both Jimmy Johns (sub place) and Papa Johns (pizza) basically ensure their shop level employees don’t get enough hours so as not to have to pay benefits for them, and then lobbied against the Affordable Health Care Act because it was going to cost them $x per sub/pizza whatever because they would have to PAY FINES for choosing to not offer healthcare to those employees themselves. Both of those of companies will no longer be getting my business. Our country, one of the richest in the world, is at the BOTTOM of the list when it comes to healthcare for our people, BOTTOM. So Im done supporting businesses that DONT support humanity!

Think its hard? Its not. We can all be more consumer conscious in small ways. If you know you frequent a business, like say Food Lion, and you have specific cause you are passionate about, let say LGBTQI equality, just check out their policies on that subject. In this case its easy, a simple Yahoo search using “LGBT, Food Lion” gives me a ton of hits showing me their positive stance. However on the LGBT issues, the Human Rights Campaign makes it even easier. They started publishing lists, guides and studies on various topics. The full list is here  but there are so many more lists out there!!!

The HRC Buyers Guide is perfect for those who want to patronize LGBTQI affirming businesses

For the list of companies supporting ENDA (Employment Nondiscrimination Act) which would protect the LGBTQI in the workplace see here

For companies supporting diversity of all types check this out

For socially responsible companies, check out Maclean’s, which is a Canadian magazine report but has many US companies on it.

For more social and environmental conscious companies see B Corps stamp of approval:

Climate conscious, here’s a list of those companies

Glassdoor’s “Best Places To Work” list was created from employee votes!,19.htm

Wanna know the best companies for working mothers to work for?

For companies supporting reproductive rights go to

Incidentally also has apps for Apple and Android, where you can set what your causes are, and then scan the bar codes on items later to see if a product is on your boycott list or not. Its pretty nifty when you can get it to work. Ive had the app since it came out, but user load was killing them so they are in the middle of redesign, and at present I cant get it to work online consistently. But STICK IT OUT, its worth it!!! Here’s the story on them

So believe me if you WANT to be a conscious consumer it isn’t as hard as you think, and of course there are going to be companies which have high marks all around, so why not praise them on your Twitter, FB and blogs so more people will know? Oh and hey pick up Dan Savage’s book while you’re at it, he’s definitely worth supporting!!  Happy shopping!!!

DanSavage                                               ©RavenHarte 1/25/14